Are You A Cleaning Pro?

This just in: kids are messy. They are stinky, sloppy, little creatures out to wreck your home.

We've all been to a home before where you walk in the door, and the odor immediately flares your nostrils. Could be that litter box right by the door, a strange staleness, something burning (HOLLA), or yes -- a recently soiled diaper.

Hey now, don't be so quick to judge! Maybe this house is YOU right now. Maybe your new to the kid scene and not used to moving furniture every other day to search for food bits and slime. Or perhaps you have let it slide a bit since COVID-19 came knocking. Or maybe you've never truly been a "clean freak".

Let's review a few cleaning pro tips (aimed at parents, but truly good for all!) and see how you fare...

CLEANING PRO TIP #1: Move the Furniture and Move It Frequently

True Story:

During a house move when I was little, we were packing up my twin bed and found an old rib bone under the bed! As in, BBQ rib bone. (I probably didn't need to clarify I wasn't killing folks left and right, and leaving spare parts under the mattress. But, eh... you never know.)

I don't remember eating ribs when I was a kid; that's how rarely we had this meal. And one was under my bed for who knows how long.

CLEANING PRO TIP #2: Ensure All Cups Are Accounted For

We all know the sink can build up a special smell if the dishes aren't attended to regularly. Leftover food and beverages sloshing around is bound to offend the senses after a point. But what about the abandoned dishes?

True Story:

Since the whole Safer-At-Home thing, only one car has been getting occasional use to pick up essentials. We got into the other vehicle about a week ago, only to find a forgotten sippy cup with old milk remains clinging to the sides.

THE SMELL.

Rookie mistake, gah! If you get out X number of cups throughout the day, that's exactly how many should go in the sink/dishwasher that night. It's a good practice for all dishes, but absolutely the cups.

CLEANING PRO TIP #3: Separate the Laundry

One chore I'm not a super fan of is the laundry. (It never stops!) But oh man, the funk can definitely build up in the basket if you're not careful.

True Story:

We have been through a lot of gross underpants and sheets in this house. And we will go through more. One particular time, my husband set a putrid sheet set on top of the washer as a sign it needed to go next. When the washer was available, I immediately threw it in with a few other clothing items.

Yes, this was a clear mistake. Especially since we both didn't realize our kid had hidden a piece of poop in the corner of the sheet. Don't think it can happen? Oh, it can. And it's not awesome.

I fought separating the laundry for years. But this event changed me. I now separate sheets, whites, delicate items, towels, and kid clothes.

CLEANING PRO TIP #4: Change the Sheets Frequently

We hear this often - change the sheets because people are gross and shed nastiness 24/7. But I'm saying it again because KIDS are gross and purposely hide things in the sheets.

True Story 1:

I already mentioned how my kid hid poop in his bed sheet. Sometime ago one of my boys (nameless because the internet is forever) was quiet in his room. When I went to check on him, I found him stuffing buckets of boogers in between his blankets like a burrito filling. Nothing short of gross.

True Story 2:

You get two stories here because I understand we need extra motivation to change sheets frequently. (I get it!) My oldest had been on the top bunk for several nights, and he is fully potty trained. I wasn't checking the sheets daily like I do the other beds. I noticed the sheets were tangled, so I reached to fix them and instead put my hand deep in soaking undies some child had I guess "hidden."

Great. Just great.

CLEANER PRO TIP #5: Don't Clean Alone

True friends don't let other friends clean alone. And I LOVE to clean. In fact, I say this because I love to clean.

I clean to calm myself, to soothe myself, to have another completed task for the day (where are my checklist people at??), and because I thrive on organization.

If I cleaned solo, I'd continue to find chores to do until it was bedtime, and miss out on family time! Sharing the chores allows me to separate myself from a task and put a specific stopping point on it. I realize this might sound crazy to non-task-oriented people, but it's a thing.

Sharing the chores has other benefits for my family, too. It encourages my kids to gain independence and understand responsibility. It also helps even the responsibility load between my husband and me.